there were two things i was certain of when i got engaged
the guy i was going to marry
and that there would be mason jars at my wedding
lots of them
everything else seemed to fall into place
around all the mason jars of course
...and then came baby...

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

calm after the storm: wedding stress

dear atmj readers,

i feel it would be unfair for me to pretend that i absolutely loved every minute of our 13 month engagement. in fact, there might have been a few meltdowns. maybe more like one dramatic meltdown, surrounded by a handful of smaller breakdowns. let's put it this way, it is much easier for me to write about wedding planning from the wedding-out-of-the-way standpoint.

our biggest stressors were the amount of dough it cost to throw a party for 175 people, who those lucky 175 would be & that we were only allowed 175 people.

a few friends of ours are getting married this year and have come to us asking things like, "how do you kindly tell your parents to bug off?" or "how can the caterer charge that much for pigs in a blanket?" the hubs & i usually exchange a "thank god that's behind us" look and then console our dear friends.

the hubs sometimes goofs with me for starting a wedding blog, considering at one point in my life i cursed all things wedding. but the funny thing is, somehow i've managed to mostly remember the good stuff...dress shopping with my mom, my san francisco bachelorette bash, signing our marriage certificate at the tiny little town hall...

don't get me wrong, i never want to deal with a guest list again. other than that, the other stuff was just that, stuff. in the moment, some of it felt heavy & unnecessary, but at the end of the day, the wedding and celebration with family & friends was worth it. 100%.

so to all you future brides out there, your wedding experience is what you make of it. i don't know many brides that will tell you the entire planning process was a walk in the park. there are highs & lows.

but for crying out loud, remember what it's about. you found someone you actually want to spend the rest of your life with and someone wants to spend the rest of their life with you, dramatic outbursts & all!

so trudge forward, laugh off the "disasters" & enjoy as many moments as possible.

and remember, it's a wedding, not open heart surgery.

much love,

a thousand mason jars...


All About The Gift Cow said...

Great post! My husband always says "weddings bring out the worst in people and funerals bring out the best." Weddings are absolutely wonderful, but that doesn't mean that planning them is easy. I highly recommend giving yourself enough time in the planning process that you can take breaks when necessary. We were engaged for 15 months and that was plenty of time for me to take extended hiatuses from planning when I felt the stress coming on. Sometimes I just needed a day and sometimes I needed two weeks, but in the end, I can honestly say that I LOVED planning my wedding and look forward to renewing our vows at some point and throwing another fabulous celebration!

Unknown said...

I totally agree with the guest list being the most stressful! All parties involved think that the peeps they want to invite are the most important. "But how can we not invite my third cousin once removed but recently got divorced so thats only 1 more...not 2!"

There are so many great moments in wedding planning though! Have a meltdown and then move on.... that's what i did! And dont let anything ruin your wedding day!